September 10, 2005
MEET HOLLY HOODHolly Hood is a fictitious(made-up) alter ego of myself.She is everything I'm not,I'm class and sass and she's grits and shit.I'm all about beauty and she's all about booty.To keep things interesting I will allow my alter ego, Holly Hood, to do a weekly commentary on news and pop culture or whatever the hell she wants.
Here she is, straight out the hood,looking more ghetto than Foxy Brown on her way to court,with more weave than all of Destiny's Child together,wearing a pair of earrings so big that she can carry her 2 baby daddies in each one,smacking gum and waving her long ass claws in the air as she sings the tune to what she thinks is a new show ...Good Times.
Hey errrbody it's ya girl Holly Hood with the week in review.I had a fucked up time getting here cuz the cabs don't stop at my brownstone,ok it's the projects,but it's made of brown stones..oh wait those is bricks?Well they brown none the less.Let's get this shit started.
Fashion Week just started in NYC and I ain't get invited to not a single fucking show,but that's cool cuz I don't wear that ugly shit anyway.The bootlegs be just as cute..instead of POLO i wear PO' and LOW, instead of Diesel I wear Deez Mine and who could afford Baby Phat when you have a fat baby...not me.It's just another week that Hollywood dedicates to skinny white chicks and the people that love them.
Did anybody catch that BET telethon? It's purpose was to raise some money for the Hurricane victims and they did.But the actual show was as ghetto as me.There were many heartfelt moments,like the interviews with the survivors,my hero Mary J. Blige and even the king of R&Pee R.Kelly brought a warming to my heart...well that and the 2 40oz of Budweiser I was drinking..why you rollin your eyes..it was out of a glass honey.
now that's scary,ain't that the Hitler wave?
Whew,did yall hear bout Mama Bush's comments?..She had said and I quote "What I'm hearing, which is sort of scary, is they all want to stay in Texas. Everyone is so overwhelmed by the hospitality,"
Why the hell is that so damn scary?Honey we are more scared of the Bush's than yall of us.I'm surprised Texas didn't offer their very nice prisons for them to sleep in.
The internet has been buzzing bout the supposed fling between Angelina Jolie and Wyclef.Why are people gagging?Yall know she loves her some refugees.
What about Condoleeza Rice getting played at a shoe store.Sources say that she was at some expensive ass shoe store here NYC while all of the south was getting they ass beat and a woman came in the store and cursed her out for not caring.See if Condoleeza was in a salon getting her hair did or at the dentist fixing that broken leevee in her mouth nobody would have bothered her ass.I know that was mean,but I don't like her.
What the fuck is up with Paris Hilton?Why is she so damn relevant to American Society,she wears long fake blonde hair,blue contacts,she fucks everybody,and she's crackhead thin,that's not a superstar..that's all the girls on my block.Shit,her biggest claim to fame is that sex tape.I did a sex tape too and you know what I got? FIRED! Well it was on my supervisor's desk but I ain't get no offer for a tv show.
Speaking of over-rated white girls, Jennifer Aniston,why does she come out the winner in this divorce?She's now dickless and lost her fine man to the sexiest bitch in Hollywood,and the movie that made them fall in love was a big blockbuster...in my book honey that's reason for rehab..I'll drive girl.
Well I'm Holly Hood and that's it for this week,I knows I'm ignorant..you ain't got to tell me.I'm just another cute idea from the ever gorgeous,always thinking,princess of blog...what's that bitch name?...Holiday N.?That ain't that bitch real name.