November 23, 2005
GAY DATING TIPSYou guys know that I'm more gay friendly than a rainbow thong on a man that's just had a bikini wax after performing drag as Judy Garland the day of his Tony Awards Party the year he was nominated for playing Queen Elizabeth in an all male version of the play with costumes by Heatherette and starring Ricky Martin who beat out Clay Aiken for the part written by Eddie Murphy co-written by Terry McMillan's ex and directed by Star Jones' hubby Al and music by Elton John((deep breath)).
Therefore it should come as no shock to you that I include gay tips also..my gay friends need dating advice too.
Dating is one of those great life experiences that we all go through. If you are a man interested in dating another gay man, there are going to be plenty of others interested in exactly the same thing. Here are a few good dating advice tips to learn ways to do it right - and to avoid the ways of doing it wrong.
1. Find other gay men
This is part of your challenge. Most straight dating environments - bars and clubs for example - are not necessarily geared for meeting someone gay. There are other gay establishments - bars, restaurants, and clubs. This is a situation where online dating comes in handy. Use one, or more, online dating services to find other gay singles. It will be private and will give you the opportunity to explore your feelings as well.
2. Have an idea of what kind of relationship you are looking for
When you decide to date, spend some time making sure you know what you are looking for. Be honest with yourself and know what will make you happy. Are you looking for a casual encounter? A longer term commitment? Or maybe even marriage? Okay, that only works in Massachusetts. At the same time, be flexible. The dating world is unpredictable, but that can be part of the fun. Enjoy what comes your way.
3. Know yourself
One of the best top Gay dating tips is to spend some time getting to know yourself better. Think of how you would like others that you might be interested in to see you. If you know that you are a fun and positive person, keep reminding yourself of that, so it shows through to others. You are probably looking for the same in men you want to date.
4. Feel good about yourself
Dating can be a tough process. You need to be prepared by feeling good about yourself. If there are things you would like to change about yourself, now is the time. Join the gym, learn a new language, start eating better - anything that will make you feel good about yourself. This will give you the confidence to show yourself off in the best light, and to be able to deal with any rejection that comes along.
5. Have fun
The most important thing to remember is to have fun! Searching for the right guy can be a fantastic experience, filled with anxiety and emotion and even drama. But if you approach it with a positive attitude and think of the hunt as being as much fun as the catch, you will have a better time. Make it easy for yourself by setting your mind to the fact that this is something fun.
6. Be a good communicator
Communication is the name of the game here. Visual, verbal, and subtle communication is what it takes. Be consistent and honest with the other guy. You will always find men that are playing games, but you are smart enough to see through that sooner or later. Ask questions and be a good listener. Use all types of communication: the phone, a written note, an email - whatever comes to mind. All of this will show your interest in the other person.
7. Don't go it alone
While you are the one doing the dating, there are ways to have support to help you along the way. Get your friends involved; let them know what you are up to. They will support you and will provide you an opportunity to talk. Surround yourself with people you respect and listen to what they have to say. This is particularly important if you are inexperienced in the dating world.
8. Follow your heart
When you are dating, listen to your mind, but follow your heart. Keep in tune with what your intuition is telling you about the other person. Is it love at first sight? Stranger things have happened.
9. Be creative
Do something unexpected. Be impulsive and see what happens. Don't be afraid to make mistakes and learn from the experience. If the other person is the right one, they will appreciate your creativity. And if they aren't, you just might have fun anyway. Being creative is even more important if you are looking for a longer term relationship, as you don't want things to become routine and uninteresting - for you or for the other man.
10. Be prepared to spend
To have a successful dating experience resulting in a relationship, you will need to spend time, money, and effort. Nothing is free in the dating world. It will take some time. Most people who date want something to happen immediately, but we have all found out that doesn't happen. You have to spend money to find the right person and spend money to make yourself ready, so don't let the expense get you down. And most importantly, be ready to work hard to get what you want.
11. Be safe
Be safe, in all senses of the word. When you are making initial contact with someone new, do it in a public place. Make sure you know as much as you can about the other person before you provide any personal information, such as your phone number, or where you live. Don't take chances and use common sense. If you feel like the other person is being too mysterious, then it is time to move on.
12. Leave when you need to
No list of best dating tips would be complete without reminding you to know when it is time to leave. Don't be afraid that you are losing your only chance to be with another man. There are going to be others. Don't settle for something that isn't right for you. You deserve better than that. Breaking up is never fun, but we all know that we recover. And if you aren't the one initiating the breakup, remember that this is part of the experience as well. Rejection is tough, but keep in mind of what might be next - it could be even better!